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In a study conducted by the U.S. Society for Human Resource Management in 2004, nearly 10% of employees said that the leaders in their organizations "are not at all trustworthy. " Around 20% believe that the organization's leadership is "only mildly trustworthy."

Trust is like the air we breathe. We take it for granted until it goes bad. Then we don't know what to do. The best time to build trust is before a problem exists. Investing in trust is one of the best investments you'll ever make. Good memories and positive experiences build up a trust "bank account" that you can draw upon when mistrust surfaces.

TRUST ON THE LINE

Trust issues arise between individuals, departments, home and field offices, new and seasoned employees, managers and direct reports. Distance in the relationship, makes it easy for mistrust to creep in. Work style differences ignite conflicts between different talent types. For instance, a get-it-done Spade can collide with an idea-loving Diamond talent.

In certain organizations and industries, built-in natural work tensions exist. Tensions frequently arise among functional groups. In insurance, the sales department and the actuarial department are historically at odds with one another. In a manufacturing firm, production versus engineering and marketing versus sales areas are ripe for tension.

Collaborate or Fail

Parties at odds need to realize it's in their best interest to collaborate. They need to rise above taking sides and shots at one another. On your team, at the outset of a project, getting to know team members and establishing personal bonds helps stave of interpersonal difficulties.

Mistrust is often caused by missed expectations and lack of clarity. Most individuals don't intentionally create mistrust. But mistrust happens all the time. Ideally, you want to ensure that your trust bank account is healthy. Then when you need to make a "withdrawal," you can do so without depleting the account.

Building Trust is No Piece of Cake

Mistrust Impacts performance - When trust is low, we retreat into functional silos, stop listening, and use back-room diplomacy to push decisions through. Lack of trust dulls our desire to contribute.

Trust issues are hard to talk about. These conversations can get to edgy. But talking about perceptions, expectations, and new behaviors helps us work through trust issues. We need to clear the air.

Trust Issues are complex - Few of us are completely "trustworthy." A visionary might be trusted to set a course for the future but inept at dealing with today's realities. We can trust each other in some areas but not all areas.

We Don't Intend to Hurt Others - Often others unaware that something they are doing is causing bad feelings and mistrust. But it happens anyway.

WHAT CAN GO WRONG...

It's the simple things that tick people off. The little things that we ignore or "don't have time for" create stumbling blocks. What starts out a pebble can quickly grow into a boulder.

I once worked with two boards, seeking to merge millions of dollars of assets, become unglued over business lunch expense! Petty differences began to erode a mega-merger.

If you feel you lack the capacity to build trust when it's broken, it's easy to give up. You might think to yourself, "There's nothing I can do about this." You end up walking away from people, jobs, and opportunities. You abandon what could have been a good relationship, market, product, or even merger. Often with skills and courage, you can turn these situations around.

CLEAN-UP DUTY

Mending trust requires dealing with ambiguities and misunderstandings and then nipping conflicts in the bud. If members of your team mistrust one another, you need to address the issues. When two people aren't getting along, get the issue out in the open by saying:

* "I notice that you guys aren't speaking to one another."

* "This meeting seems flat. You're all quiet about the new initiative."

* "I'm sensing that there's some uncertainty about this idea. Let's talk about it." As a general principle, when you sense tension in the air, you're probably correct.

Level the Playing Field

To resolve trust issues everyone must be an equal. Suppose two team members are in conflict. If one person is a long-term employee and the other is new, create equality and freedom to speak openly in the meeting. I once worked with a hospital staff where the doctors and nursing staff were at odds with each other. The nurses felt the doctors were ignoring their requests, and making their work lives unnecessarily difficult. The nurses felt they had no right to speak up about the situation. In their culture the doctors were untouchable.

To resolve this ongoing crisis, we held a meeting involving all participants. The location itself was neutral - a conference room down a wing and on a floor that most participants rarely visited.

Encourage Dialogue

We placed the chairs in a circle, with doctors and nurses in an alternate seating pattern. Circular seating promotes dialogue and helps eliminate some of the power differences among participants. By avoiding a face-to-face seating arrangement, we diminished the air of confrontation.

During our session, everybody had the opportunity to speak their minds. When the nurses were talking, the doctors were silent. When the doctors were talking, the nurses were silent. Each side had the opportunity to share their feelings, and air their views without interruptions.

After developing a long roster of grievances, we turned to the five elements of trust. Conflict- or caring- type issues predominated. In different ways, nursing participants repeatedly felt the doctors were uncaring. "You forgot about me."

In these sessions, everyone needs continually reminding: most offenses are unintentional. People do not arise in the morning thinking, "Hmm, who can I disrespect today?" Often offenders have no clue about the impact of their actions.

Keep Probing for Needs

People on both sides routinely want to be heard. Most people want to feel respected. Most people want to be productive on the job without being hampered by others. Find those areas where shared desires exist. Probe for similarities. Don't make assumptions - let them tell you.

Participants need to like each other to build trust. It's nice if trust leads to better relationships. But it certainly is not necessary. At the core, trust is being able to count on one another.

What Happens Next?

Everyone wants to feel validated. Once you're acknowledged what happened, move on by asking participants, "Now, what do you want? What would you like to see happen? What actions will you take to improve the situation? What are you prepared to do?"

No one can fix the past. But before you can go forward, it's often necessary to talk about what happened, share perceptions and feeling, and acknowledge mistakes. Once sharing makes it possible to go forward.

Tackling Trust Issues

To tackle a trust issue, start by saying, "There's something recurring that I'd like to talk to you about. Can we talk?" Or, you can simply say, "I have a problem, can we talk?" In most cases, they will say yes. Next arrange a mutually convenient time, at a neutral location to meet.

At the first meeting share your concerns. "I'd like to be open and candid and I hope you will be too. There will be no repercussions." Then, identify and discuss the issue. "I'm frustrated when you are late for our team meetings."

Share how you feel and the impact on others. "It makes me feel as if you don't value the meetings and what we're seeking to accomplish." Or "It makes me feel that our team isn't important to you." Or, "When one person is missing, it holds up the entire team."

Then invite the individual to share his or her point of view. To ensure that you have leveled the playing field, restate your desire for candor. If it helps use language that encourages the other person's response, such as:

* "I'm curious, how do you really feel about our team meetings?"

* "Is there something about our meetings that doesn't work for you?"

* "Is there some suggestion you'd like to make?"

Are You Willing?

Once both of you have shared your perceptions about the situation. Ask for what you want. Would you be willing to do what it takes to arrive on time? Can I count on this from you? Sharing feelings and perceptions is one thing, but without commitment to new behavior, nothing is likely to change. As obvious as it may sound, state what you'd like to have happen. Then ask, "Are you willing to do that?" Solutions become easier when you've aired all the issues and you come to agreement.

Thereafter, you monitor the progress. You notice what's going well and also make course corrections. "I noticed you came on time for a couple meetings, then you seemed to slip back." Share what's working and what isn't working.

Offer your assistance. Once you're tackle an issue successfully, you'll build a springboard affect and be able to handle whatever comes up.

Facts to Remember

Trust Helps Us Succeed - Trust helps us collaborate, share information, and give each other the benefit of the doubt. With it, we're assured better assignments and greater autonomy. Our careers expand when others feel they can rely on us. The more others trust us, the more they are willing to depend on our presence, abilities, and decisions. Trust creates a backlog of goodwill that protects us when we make mistakes.

Blind Trust Is Dangerous - Some people trust no one-while others trust everyone. Assuming a modest level of trust helps us establish a relationship. But too much trust early on can lead to disappointment. Trust must be built over time-one interaction at a time. When we first meet someone, we instinctively size up whether we can trust the person. It's wise to have shared experiences and gradually increase our trust and dependency.

Trust Requires Vulnerability - Trust always requires a leap of faith. Wisely, and sometimes not so wisely, we hesitate to be vulnerable. For example, a co-worker disappoints us and we say nothing. We do not trust the person enough to take the risk. We're not sure it's worth it. To build trust we need to take a risk, share our frustration, and hope the individual will see our point of view.

Trust takes time to develop-but it can be shattered in a minute. Even in strong relationships, trust can be broken. In every interaction we have with someone, we are either building/maintaining trust or destroying it. To increase trust, we need to address problems, admit mistakes, and notice when trust is declining. It takes deliberate effort to build high-trust relationships. It's worth doing. The dividends of high trust are ease, agility, speed, fun and high performance.

Topics

• Building Trust